There are many things to be said for the character that comes from our battles. Some seem big and some small. Sometimes the big ones help us to get thru the smaller ones or visa versa. I am grateful for mine. They have made me an even more complex creature, while at the same time simplifying my life.
There’s a song on Vivian Green’s new album titled “Caught Up”. I love the message. It is simple and true for everyone. No judgment. We ALL get caught up. It’s a matter of how far, how many times, recognizing it, and bringing yourself back to what is important. We all know the definition of insanity: doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result.
So I am settling into the ‘new normal’, as one of the other adoptive mothers put it. I’m focusing on what I cared about before and balancing it with what I care about even more now.
One thing that becomes clearer ever year is how much I believe everything happens for a reason. So cliché right? Well the reason is according to HIS will. Every Christian has a life purpose. The struggle then lies in our discernment of what that is. It is so easy to get “caught up” in life. You have to be careful to pursue what He has for you as opposed to what you envision for yourself. I promise you, His plan far exceeds any expectations you may have and will fulfill your life beyond what you or society have in mind.
Pastor John Ortberg once said “..for many people a career becomes the altar on which they sacrifice their lives. A calling, which is something I do for God, is replaced by a career which threatens to become my god.” How true is this! We all have different goals and different visions of how we will ‘make it’. It is so hard to set those aside to listen to His voice.
I’ve found myself with stronger desires in a few areas of my life… in particular; my schooling, vision for making a difference for those in need, and for my present (and future) family. I go between feeling sure of the desires of my heart and praying God will show me and fulfill them, to doubting that those desires are what He has in store for me, and praying for discernment about what truly comes from Him. Then I find myself grieving a lost dream even though I have more now that that dream really ever entailed. Then I come full circle to this calm, yet exciting, wonder about what is happening now for me to be prepared for the future.
Okay Lord, my blindfold is on. Lead me and I’ll try to keep from cheating and peaking under and going where I think is safest.
Psalm 37:4,7 Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He shall give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord, trust also in Him, and He shall bring it to pass... Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for Him
1 Chronicles 16:11 Seek the LORD and His strength; seek His face continually.
Psalm 25:9 He guides the humble in what is right and teaches them his way.
Proverbs 2:6-9 For the LORD gives wisdom; from His mouth come knowledge and understanding. He stores up sound wisdom for the upright; He is a shield to those who walk in integrity, guarding the paths of justice, and He preserves the way of His godly ones. Then you will discern righteousness and justice and equity and every good course.
Proverbs 16:9 A man’s heart plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps.
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